Tuesday

Ask Ty...September 2 // Mope Squad America! (Special Double Bonus Web Log Posting)

Special Judgment Edition
Q:

One
: This whole Palin deal is almost TOO good to be true. On the one hand it's the worst VP call since Eagleton in the 1972 campaign. I mean this chick is just weird. And who started this rumor that SHE pretended to have her son to cover up that he was really her daughters child...now that would have been news...the husband got nabbed for drunken driving like 20 years ago (is that still not legal) and she's going up in front of her own Ethics Board...The McCain Camp has got to be elated with their pick, right? But wait a second here what's this quote:
"Being a Christian does not mean you're perfect," said Focus on the Family founder James Dobson. "Nor does it mean your children are perfect. But it does mean there is forgiveness and restoration when we confess our imperfections to the Lord."
That sounds awwwwesommme! Sign me up for this Christian Club. But maybe they were like this is great, let's get the National Enquirer crowd excited. It's just a little white trash...has some MILF appeal...and appeals to those willing to believe Palin would give birth to McCain's (newest) love child in order to protect him. Too bad Jerry Springer doesn't host a show any more.

It's actually brilliant! But I think the whole thing is suspect though.

- CK


Two: When I heard on Friday evening that McCain had nominated the female governor of Alaska, I thought, "It's over. McCain neutralized the Change factor." "You want Change? Here's your change. people! With 100% less suspected Muslim!" Then when I got home and found out who she was, I thought, "Is he really this retarded?

The one effective argument McCain has over Obama (besides the latent racism of Americans) is "experience." It's so effective that Obama chose a Suit for a lame-o running mate. And what does McCain do? Choose the Mayor of Wasilla for his running mate. ???? It not only emphasizes the fact that he's borderline insane, but that he's going to die soon. It allows the Democrats to bring up Age in a very legitimate way.

See Rahm Emmanuel:
"On his 72nd birthday, is this really the one-heartbeat-away he wants to put in the White House?" said Rep. Rahm Emanuel, the No. 3 Democrat in the House. "What does this say about his judgment?"
How it actually plays out is someone else's business.

- RW


Three: But imagine if Hopey Barack's 17-y.o. daughter was preggers.... The Jesus Christ Gang would be callin' her a crack whore. But Palin's daughter is Mary Magdalene. Luckily the Gov-nah gets an NRA discount for that shotgun wedding!

- G/MB

Ty: Good questions and even better observations. OK, there really aren't any questions here but, stick with me, I'm simply folding old emails into the Ask Ty format. I'm also catching up with Mope Squad. Two for one. Just like the Palin pick, two for one: loss and humiliation. Clever.

Actually, there are some questions. I have some questions for John "No Change" McCain. Maybe just one question I have.

Here it is:

Really, you're serious?

Nice call, too, on Tommy "Psych Ward" Eagleton, Cass. Mostly because you're showing your work here given you weren't even born. Yes, that may be the (now second) worst VP selection in the American history surpassing even Danny Quayle and Gerry Ferraro. Our hottie Guv-Nor Palin even blows Admiral James "Who am I? Why am I here?" Stockdale (Look it up yourself! Do I have to spoon-feed here?) out of the ocean. But, alas, the good Admiral was never a viable contender.

Fishy? I'm starting to believe that this has to be a brilliant conspiracy. Really, really sloppy at the minimum. But, if it's deliberate, it's a crazy set-up. Will she leave the ticket? There's already talk. After three days, there's already talk of abandonment, and Wonkette is already running a Sarah Palin "Fail-o-Meter"/premature withdrawal watch. Ha!

But, I don't think it is. I just think it's more Failure. American Failure. Johnny "No Change" McCain Failure. Bring back the slogan, "Bush's Third Term." No, maybe not. This form of Judgement makes Bush look bright enough attend the after school Chess Club.

There's just too much on Palin. I don't even have to go into it because the alternative and mainstream news is burning down the hizzle with news and further rumor on the Palins. It's just way too bizarre to be real. But let me note that all I was saying over the weekend was, "look to Todd" for your dirt. But, we can't even get to him yet becuase the mud's too deep around Levi Johnston's igloo. But, believe me, Todd's gonna provide many laughs, hoots, hollers, giggles, snickers, and howls. Just trust me on this.

Funny, the McCainiacs say she was vetted but the FBI reports that no background check was conducted on Palin. Sloppy or deliberate misdirection to slip Huckabee in? We'll just have to let this play out (but it's soooo painfully embarrassing as an American).

Now I'm rooting for a McCain/Palin win so the next eight years will be even more fun than the past eight for Mope Squad America! <-- Uh, OMG JK! Just a guess, -ty P.S. Meanwhile, (thanks to Salon's War Room) David Frum and Charles Krauthammer disagree on Sarah Palin. Frum first:

Mr. McCain's supporters argue that he is more serious about national security than Barack Obama. But the selection of Sarah Palin invites the question: How serious can he be if he would place such a neophyte second in line to the presidency? Barack Obama at least balanced his inexperience with Mr. Biden's experience. What is Mr. McCain doing?

The worrying continues with Krauthammer:

The Palin selection completely undercuts the argument about Obama's inexperience and readiness to lead -- on the theory that because Palin is a maverick and a corruption fighter, she bolsters McCain's claim to be the reformer in this campaign ... At the same time, he's weakening his strong suit -- readiness vs. unreadiness. The McCain campaign is reveling in the fact that Palin is a game changer. But why a game changer when you've been gaining? To gratuitously undercut the remarkably successful "Is he ready to lead" line of attack seems near suicidal.
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