Try Not To Think


The sporting press
The randy gossip
Sentries of American democracy

Lust            the mind and body

Not everyone sees
    what we see

Visionaries who understand the potential of [         ]
    long before most people do

The history of loving
From beginning to end
Having always been
    in love

A feeling of unstoppable
Giving from deep inside
Until there is
    nothing left

It never ever matters
If there are consequences
Because life is
    ultimately short

If the only thing
One is remembered for
is how much
    they loved

The fundamental goal
in living this long
and full life is learning

About self and others
but mostly about self 

Because one can only
control what one can
control ultimately



“Boy on Roof” Monroe Street, New York, Walter Rosenblum, 1950

for Evan


Situations are Infinite


That may have been the very last warning

The more it takes the more I want to take until I take it all

A lot going on - one makes particular choices to suit situation and desire

But it’s not even that I know what it is I desire

And situations are infinite

I'm uncertain when it started but we’ll have a really good idea when it ends

So frightened of losing the whole hand but that’s the risk when we go all in

We just have to keep a poker face and power forward despite

Born alone
Live alone
Die alone

There are no real goals and there never really were

It is almost like I am at my best when I am dead inside

And–more often than not–there is where I live

It is the basis of my being perhaps

But it makes the highs so much higher

An exploration of rabbit holes and storm drains resulting

There is a certain lightness within a darkness––the weight removed

Performative and societal pseuicide–Ars Moriendi my friends


I Simply Cannot Compete (with your smartphones)

As in a dream-state dreamscape
I cannot seem to remember which station it was
    where I got off the train
        or where I was going or why I got off
Yet here I wander in a strange but familiar place

Alone and fully exposed
Wearing vulnerability as awkwardly as an ill fitting suit
    because the brain chemistry changes
        during the course of a marathon
Our desires are the motivational properties of addiction

I will always be one of one and never will I be one of many
Waxing and waning philosophies since inception
    What more can we give • What more can we be
        Still learning • Still building
You can lead a horse to mirrors but you cannot make it reflect

What I want is exactly what I need as desires decussate necessity
    (at the seventieth percentile mark of this life)
All constructs have fallen afoul and are helplessly farcical now
It no longer matters if the trains run on time
    if there is no longer an intention to get back on