Grab Bag - UPDATE

1. Dang
Sadly, Randy Pausch, the Carnegie Mellon University computer scientist whose "last lecture" about facing terminal cancer became an Internet sensation and a best-selling book, died Friday.

He was 47. [clicky]

Yeah, I harshed the guy [clicky], but you know what? I hope people are harshing me when I'm on my way out. I'd do it again too.

RIP. I'll pour one out for him later.


I Said It...

That "Last Lecture" was fucking garbage. I couldn't even make it through all eleven minutes of a dying man's final words because it was such deplorable tripe.

"The true meaning of life is taking your kids to Disney World!"

I'm paraphrasing, obviously. But I would hope that if I were faced with my impending death I could search my soul a little deeper and find something a little more profound than the soccer mom pleasantries he managed to conjure.

"Don't worry! Be happy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Okay, I have nothing against the guy and probably would have liked him but he's emblematic of this country's cultural and spiritual decay that ultimately results in things like President George W. Bush, the H2, and other such bullshit.

That's all. Thank you."


2. Rang

I don't want to harsh your buzz or anything, but I'm pretty sure that's not an iPhone.

Did the Apple Store you bought it from have cardboard walls, cardboard doors, and was made out of a cardboard box?

Were they also selling pagers and DVDs of The Dark Knight?

You might want to look into that.


Jealous much? Ha-ha-ha, very funny, sucker. You're not harshing my buzz, son. This is the NEW iPhone dummy. It has three major advantages over the old piece of crap iPhone:
1) Antenna for better reception
2) Flips closed to save space
3) Buttons for easier dialing.
Look into that, dumbass! You look so good in that shade of green.


3. Ka-Chang
I don't know anything about Tim Kaine. I don't care about Tim Kaine. I just like the flow of Obama-Kaine.


You know, "I'm gonna hit you like OBAMA-KAINE KATRINA!"

Keep on talking like Obama-Kaine hurricane!

- US American



Keep on trucking' like Obama-Kaine's hurricane
Blowing static on the paranoid short-wave
Short fuse, got to dismantle
Code red: what's your handle?

Mission incredible undercover convoy
Full-tilt chromosome cowboy
X-ray search and destroy
Smokestack blacktop Obama-Kaine boy

Got some rum, longhorn drums
Detonate with the suicide gate
Test tube, stillborn and dazed
drugstore plains in the razor's haze
Got the momentum radioactive

Circumcised for the operation
Full spectrum generation
Cyanide ride down the turnpike
After hours on the miracle mic

Grinding the gears eighteen wheels
Pigs and robots riding on their heels
Power through the roadblock
Making a sandblast

Diesel aluminum cruising like drain-o
Down the horizon purple gasses
Semi-trucks hauling their asses
Obama-Kaine, hit the road expressway

Obama-Kaine, da da dah

Obama-Kaine, da da dah


Ooof! That's a little bit, uh...terroristic.