Ask Ty...June 30

Q: Why is my family so crazy?

Just wondering,

- DB, Syracuse

Ty: Good question and an even better observation, DB.

Here's the deal: Your family isn't crazy. All families are crazy. And your family is part of all families.

I mean, you're asking me?! See: An Historical Record for God sake. I'm 42 years-old and am just beginning to reconcile family. Your family is indeed crazy and, conversely, they all believe you to be nutty too. Trust me. Same for me and same for everyone else. What has happened is that a group of people you felt you knew and whom you felt you should know are now or have always really been strangers; they are people you hardly know (or whom you hardly know anymore). It's like anyone you haven't seen in forever and haven't kept up with events and ideals. Just go to a high school reunion and you can feel the same thing: who are these fat, weridos?

But, the family instinct leads us to feel that we should have some sympathy and compassion and knowledge of these people. They look familiar. They smell the same. There's an emotional pull stronger than any logic or intelligence. Our blood feels synced. Thicker than mud, thicker than naught. Believe me, I've compartmentalized all notions of "family" and I still have illogical and sudden pulls toward these people I hardly know. I have a cousin who I grew up with that calls on occasion and it's like some random stranger calling me but someone this person possesses some knowledge of not only my past, but of some of the secret stuff I'm internalizing. But, the few things in common you realize you have include need for oxygen, and that we both noticed the sun came up this morning. But, there is still love. I would protect some of these people if it came to that. I won't send them money (so don't ask), but I might lie in court. Weird, huh? And, yes, they are crazy. What must they think of me?

Your family is crazy because you are crazy because we are all crazy. Whatever that means.

Just a guess,