Inner Dialog on the Outside - IV

The problem is we are all, as a nation, so busy protesting and fussing and concerning our frightened, self-interested, self-righteous selves over such make believe things like a pretend socialist takeover and over-hyped tea bagging protest counts and who called whom a liar and what that really means, that we have ALLOWED our water to go bad and our air to foul and our education system to rot and our fear-based hatreds to fester. We are dumb all over and the consequences do not include heaven because that's just as make believe, self-interested, self-righteous and frightened.

It is our very own collective faults that the internal combustion engine is killing our children and our planet and that we are at war over oil and constructs where the reduction of human lives to "collateral" damages is easily justified. Blame only us that we are still so morbidly concerned that "The Invisible Godmonster won’t like" our behaviors so we behave only like the ignorant fools that we loathe.

It is 2010 and we are still afraid of the blacks and the gays and the Mexicans and the Muslims and the women and the teenagers and the Europeans and the poor and the urban and the rural and the addled and the homeless. We are Generation Purell® Bubblewrap Home Alarm Handgun Outrage.

When we feel the need to point fingers of blame for our woes, we need to point those fingers of blame at our own mirrors. How about trying this: put down your Socialist Nazi Muslim Elitist signs (often misspelled) and make some new ones that read "I Demand Clean Water" and "More College Graduates Now!"

For the chillrens.

Inner Dialog on the Outside - III

It is my firm belief that any modicum of success I have in this life will be because I reinvented wheels and almost always improvised. My obstinate insistence that there is always a better way has always served me better than anybody's rules.

In reviewing the story thus far, it seems that not only has this philosophy produced the best outcomes for me, but it's been the only way I've played the game. All I know is all I know.

Because I was never handed an operations manual (and wouldn't read it anyway), I've always been able to do shit like Sinatra and The Beatles: My way and with a little help from my friends.

I may someday be judged a failure but it won't because I didn't attempt big things.

Inner Dialog on the Outside - II

I'm having a bit of difficulty articulating something. Perhaps I should employ a well-spoken and articulate negro (although I'd be labeled an elitist socialist for the association) to help me with this. What I'm having a difficult articulating is this:

Never have I intended to be unbiased or serve as some sort of neutral journalist eyewitness in this deal. If there is a story to tell, I full well plan to be a part of the story rather than merely reporting what happened. More important to me is to report what my experience was in this story. In fact, if there are things I can do to create the story, all the better.

Perhaps I'm shooting for something that transcends social documentary. Something more deliberate, more authentic than reporting. Something that is comfortable and beautiful being the bullshit it is:

Art. Art in 2010. Ha! The story, I know realize, is about me.

So true it is that I don't want to do what has been done already.

Inner Dialog on the Outside - I

So the subject of my "condition" and "what little of [my] internal dialogue is available to the outside world" came up recently. What?! Am I not enough like Mayor Koch with all the How'm I doin'? soul searching? And there I believed I was walking everyone through all the steps in my processes. Easy step-by-step guide to my inner workings, I thought. Am I being vague?

Well, as with anyone, my so-called dialogue is all over the map. You know, normal, like everyone else. There are highs and there are days like today: the questions all unanswered and unanswerable.

As always, my mind is on my work; inseparable as it is from my life. So my mind is on my life.

Ty Hardaway Mission Statement: To do my work and survive, sustain, grow, thrive, and bring along as many of those I love, like, trust, and respect as I can.

Today's "inner dialogue" is all about how to generate cash flow to execute said mission.

La ejecución es el diablo
L'exécution est le diable
דורכפירונג איז דער טייוול
Pagpugot ng ulo ay ang demonyo
執行是魔鬼
Framkvæmd er djöfullinn

Other than that, there is no inner dialogue. Happy to clear that up for y'all.