Now it's time to gloat. Officially.
Do it!
Thursday
Morticia Miscalculamation
[What's great is I only have write about half of my material anymore]
"I'm sure Douche Bush fired Rumsfeld yesterday in part to limit press coverage of the Democratic victory. Bump them off of a few headlines.
But he screwed up because the best thing to do would have been to have animatronic Nancy Pelosi all over the teevee for a couple of news cycles. Give the people a couple days of THAT nightmare and then come back from Crawford all loose and jokey and rested from a long weekend of tequila, cocaine, and Mexican blow jobs.
'Heya guys! I'm back! Ditcha miss me? [huh-huh] Who let Granma Morticia in here? [snort]. Jesus, somebody open a window (if you know what I mean?). Hey granny, pull muh finger [hee-hee]'"
- The Otter
"I'm sure Douche Bush fired Rumsfeld yesterday in part to limit press coverage of the Democratic victory. Bump them off of a few headlines.
But he screwed up because the best thing to do would have been to have animatronic Nancy Pelosi all over the teevee for a couple of news cycles. Give the people a couple days of THAT nightmare and then come back from Crawford all loose and jokey and rested from a long weekend of tequila, cocaine, and Mexican blow jobs.
'Heya guys! I'm back! Ditcha miss me? [huh-huh] Who let Granma Morticia in here? [snort]. Jesus, somebody open a window (if you know what I mean?). Hey granny, pull muh finger [hee-hee]'"
- The Otter
Ex-Senator Mope
"The Allen loss is oh so sweet too. President Allen? Nope. Mope Allen.I love that this all came down to Macaca. Without Macaca, [he] would be President-elect Allen '08 instead of George "Mope" Allen, douchebag. Fucker.
Yankee, go home!"
-A contributor from "out west"
----------------------------
"This fellow here, over here with the yellow shirt, macaca, or whatever his name is. He's with my opponent. He's following us around everywhere. And it's just great.... Let's give a welcome to macaca, here. Welcome to America and the real world of Virginia."
-George "Mope" Allen
Wednesday
Kevin's New Record
Order Date: November 8, 2006
Order #: 102-2256847-6668118
You can still add items to this order using 1-Click ordering. Items not yet shipped:
Delivery estimate: November 10, 2006
I don't really know, but I somehow just had to order the new Kevin's new record. I'm not sure why, but I'm guessing that there are reasons that my intuition could answer.
Here are possible explanations of my behavior:
1) I'm curious: It can't be as bad as they all say. I don't really know much about the guy but it seems that he is getting judged by things other than his art (I know, that's funny as shit).
2) How bad could it be, he continues to hook up and convince women to have all of his babies.
3) Maybe it is that bad but there are some killer samples I could use (since he can't afford legal representation to sue me).
4) I really don't know, but I'm somehow magically in his corner. Whatever.
5) Perhaps I'm crazy.
Life is funny sometimes.
Order #: 102-2256847-6668118
You can still add items to this order using 1-Click ordering. Items not yet shipped:
Delivery estimate: November 10, 2006 - 1 of: Playing With Fire [Explicit Lyrics]
Sold by: Amazon Export Sales, Inc.
I don't really know, but I somehow just had to order the new Kevin's new record. I'm not sure why, but I'm guessing that there are reasons that my intuition could answer.
Here are possible explanations of my behavior:
1) I'm curious: It can't be as bad as they all say. I don't really know much about the guy but it seems that he is getting judged by things other than his art (I know, that's funny as shit).
2) How bad could it be, he continues to hook up and convince women to have all of his babies.
3) Maybe it is that bad but there are some killer samples I could use (since he can't afford legal representation to sue me).
4) I really don't know, but I'm somehow magically in his corner. Whatever.
5) Perhaps I'm crazy.
Life is funny sometimes.
Never Mind
"Today is a day for gloating."
-RPW
Ah, screw it. I'm happy as a goddamn puppy with a mouth full of dog shit.
"Republicans surrendered the Texas seat of former Majority Leader Tom DeLay, who left the House after being charged in a campaign finance scheme, the Ohio seat once held by Bob Ney, who resigned after pleading guilty in a lobbying scandal, and the Florida district of Mark Foley, who stepped down after the disclosure that he sent sexually explicit messages to male congressional pages.
In Pennsylvania, Democrats defeated Curt Weldon in the fallout from a federal corruption investigation and Don Sherwood who admitted to a long-term affair with a much younger woman who says he choked her."
-RPW
Ah, screw it. I'm happy as a goddamn puppy with a mouth full of dog shit.
"Republicans surrendered the Texas seat of former Majority Leader Tom DeLay, who left the House after being charged in a campaign finance scheme, the Ohio seat once held by Bob Ney, who resigned after pleading guilty in a lobbying scandal, and the Florida district of Mark Foley, who stepped down after the disclosure that he sent sexually explicit messages to male congressional pages.
In Pennsylvania, Democrats defeated Curt Weldon in the fallout from a federal corruption investigation and Don Sherwood who admitted to a long-term affair with a much younger woman who says he choked her."
And, Here’s My Problem
I was asked if I was excited this morning. My first reaction was, “Well, no. There’s still this bogus war, the president is still a mope, the vice president is still evil, there are two senate races still in play, and I have little confidence in the democrats running shit in an organized, responsible fashion.” Not what people were expecting from me this morning.
Excited? Sure. Yea, excited. Right. I am wearing my “In a Blue State of Mind” shirt this morning.
And, here’s my problem: Now is not a time for celebration. Responsible democrats would have had a muted celebratory message – unified:
“This is not a time for hubris. This is a time to instill confidence in people all over the world that the United States government is a serious, intelligent, responsible and representative body that acts in the fiscal and social best interest of all Americans.”
Period. Wry grin at best. No dancing, no confetti. No champagne. Muted.
This is not a time for hubris, or (overt) payback (I say “overt” since that shit is due, my friends). But hubris? We have no time for hubris. Impeachment? No. Not yet anyway.
“We have to work very hard to responsibly resolve the war that George W. Bush and Dick Cheney started. We expect the president and the vice president to work with us to do just that.”
Here’s where we cut a deal. George and Dick comply and they escape articles of impeachment, they step out of line, we start that fucked-up process again. Why hold off on impeachment? It’s only payback and 1) we need to move forward as a people, 2) There’s way too much repair to complete, and 3) The democrats need to focus on their shit first. Bush & Cheney…forget them. This is an opportunity for the dems, maybe a last opportunity because the republican machine isn’t shutting off anytime soon. It’s refueling. If the dems don’t get their act together quickly and consistently, the pendulum will swing back – hard and ’08 will be pure fantasy for them.
In fact, I’m willing to come back after some tough love. Show me SOMETHING, ANYTHING and I will come back for the ’08 primary. ANYTHING!
Excited about last night? For sending to these louts to the dugout, Santorum, Pombo, Kitty, Burns & Allen, Ehrlich, Steele, DeWine, Chafee, Talent, and the rest of that dangerous gang, I applaud America.
We welcome Deval Patrick, Bob Casey, Sheldon Whitehouse, Mike O’Malley, Ben, Cardin, and obviously others, to the big stage.
With power comes responsibility. Don't be dicks.
Excited? Sure. Yea, excited. Right. I am wearing my “In a Blue State of Mind” shirt this morning.
And, here’s my problem: Now is not a time for celebration. Responsible democrats would have had a muted celebratory message – unified:
“This is not a time for hubris. This is a time to instill confidence in people all over the world that the United States government is a serious, intelligent, responsible and representative body that acts in the fiscal and social best interest of all Americans.”
Period. Wry grin at best. No dancing, no confetti. No champagne. Muted.
This is not a time for hubris, or (overt) payback (I say “overt” since that shit is due, my friends). But hubris? We have no time for hubris. Impeachment? No. Not yet anyway.
“We have to work very hard to responsibly resolve the war that George W. Bush and Dick Cheney started. We expect the president and the vice president to work with us to do just that.”
Here’s where we cut a deal. George and Dick comply and they escape articles of impeachment, they step out of line, we start that fucked-up process again. Why hold off on impeachment? It’s only payback and 1) we need to move forward as a people, 2) There’s way too much repair to complete, and 3) The democrats need to focus on their shit first. Bush & Cheney…forget them. This is an opportunity for the dems, maybe a last opportunity because the republican machine isn’t shutting off anytime soon. It’s refueling. If the dems don’t get their act together quickly and consistently, the pendulum will swing back – hard and ’08 will be pure fantasy for them.
In fact, I’m willing to come back after some tough love. Show me SOMETHING, ANYTHING and I will come back for the ’08 primary. ANYTHING!
Excited about last night? For sending to these louts to the dugout, Santorum, Pombo, Kitty, Burns & Allen, Ehrlich, Steele, DeWine, Chafee, Talent, and the rest of that dangerous gang, I applaud America.
We welcome Deval Patrick, Bob Casey, Sheldon Whitehouse, Mike O’Malley, Ben, Cardin, and obviously others, to the big stage.
With power comes responsibility. Don't be dicks.
Love
I LOVE this game. I LOVE this shit:
"Bush made just one phone call on Tuesday night -- to Rep. Tom Reynolds, R-N.Y., chairman of the House GOP's election effort, who was re-elected."
- Associated Press, November 8, 2006, 9:48 a.m. from article titled, "Bush Extends Democrats Congratulations."
"Bush made just one phone call on Tuesday night -- to Rep. Tom Reynolds, R-N.Y., chairman of the House GOP's election effort, who was re-elected."
- Associated Press, November 8, 2006, 9:48 a.m. from article titled, "Bush Extends Democrats Congratulations."
Tuesday
Game Time
Today is the biggest midterm since '94.
I'll be at a precinct all day working it; doing my part for a fair and accurate election. Whining will not be tolerated. You should be there too.
I love the battle, I savor the war. It's game time, bitches!
Stories to follow tomorrow or later...
I'll be at a precinct all day working it; doing my part for a fair and accurate election. Whining will not be tolerated. You should be there too.
I love the battle, I savor the war. It's game time, bitches!
Stories to follow tomorrow or later...
Monday
Ask Ty…November 6
Q: Ty, two questions. Is it true your name "Ty" is short for Tylenol? And, is that your real skin, or are you tanned?
Just wondering,
F. McJewelry
Ty: F., good question and an even better observation. Indeed, my skin is light brown. Cocoa moving toward mocha. Brown is a natural, down-to-earth neutral color. It is found in earth, wood, and stone. Brown represents wholesomeness and earthiness. While it might be considered a little on the dull side, it also represents steadfastness, simplicity, friendliness, dependability, and health. Although blue is the typical corporate color, UPS (United Parcel Service) has built their business around the dependability associated with brown.
I am brown. “Tanned”? No. Brown? Yes. Sienna, bay, sand, wood, dapple, auburn, chestnut, nut-brown, cinnamon, russet, tawny, chocolate, tan, brunette, fawn, liver-colored, mahogany, oak, bronze, terra-cotta, toast, umber, cocoa, coffee, copper, ecru, ginger, hazel, khaki, ochre, puce, snuff, and poop. Brown.
Yes, F., this is my real skin color.
No, Ty is not short for Tylenol although some of the kids attempted to call me that on occasion in middle and high school (along with Tyfus, Tyful, Thai stick, TyTy, and TJ). But, it never stuck. Didn’t get a rise. I knew a couple of Tylers, a Tyson. Rarely, there was another Tyrone. I am a Tyrone. But, Tylenol?
No, F., My name is not short for Tylenol.
Just a guess. - Ty
Just wondering,
F. McJewelry
Ty: F., good question and an even better observation. Indeed, my skin is light brown. Cocoa moving toward mocha. Brown is a natural, down-to-earth neutral color. It is found in earth, wood, and stone. Brown represents wholesomeness and earthiness. While it might be considered a little on the dull side, it also represents steadfastness, simplicity, friendliness, dependability, and health. Although blue is the typical corporate color, UPS (United Parcel Service) has built their business around the dependability associated with brown.
I am brown. “Tanned”? No. Brown? Yes. Sienna, bay, sand, wood, dapple, auburn, chestnut, nut-brown, cinnamon, russet, tawny, chocolate, tan, brunette, fawn, liver-colored, mahogany, oak, bronze, terra-cotta, toast, umber, cocoa, coffee, copper, ecru, ginger, hazel, khaki, ochre, puce, snuff, and poop. Brown.
Yes, F., this is my real skin color.
No, Ty is not short for Tylenol although some of the kids attempted to call me that on occasion in middle and high school (along with Tyfus, Tyful, Thai stick, TyTy, and TJ). But, it never stuck. Didn’t get a rise. I knew a couple of Tylers, a Tyson. Rarely, there was another Tyrone. I am a Tyrone. But, Tylenol?
No, F., My name is not short for Tylenol.
Just a guess. - Ty
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